Brain Maze

I have been moving through this morning in a kind of fog or semi-negativity. I have a perfect day ahead of me and I was finding it difficult to get out of bed and begin. Like driving to Disneyland and then not being sure if you want to go in through the gate. If humans came with the conveniences of modern cars I would see a Low Life Enjoyment light come on and I would pull over and have it looked at.

I got my chores and needfuls done and then came into the office and sat down and tried to avoid looking at any news or facebook. In doing so, I found unproductive things to do that did nothing to change my attitude. Not helpful at all.

My malaise deepened and I wondered what I could do. Everything I thought of gave me an immediate avoidance shock and I spiraled down the devil's rotini.

Then it came to me as a bird blown in through an open window; write something. Don't worry what it is, just write something. As it turns out, I started on this piece here.

Already the weight of a thousand soiled diapers is lifting from my countenance.

it - Is - WORKING!

It being Veteran's Day, I saw some tributes to fathers who had been in the service and it brought my thoughts back to my own father. I wonder how many lifetimes I would have to live in order to reform my thoughts concerning my father. I say I have forgiven him, but I haven't. I've come to some kind of agreement with myself about him. I'm not even sure what that agreement is. Maybe, if he stays dead, I will not confront him.

Whoa, bring her around, Stuyvesant! We're heading for the rocks again.

OK, so I have lots of fun Disneyland-type things to do and I have everything I need to do them. My hands and fingers are as limber as a Frenchman in olive oil and I'm raring to type. Arrrrrrr!

(I was going to write about Christmas.)

More later,


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