Trough for the Day

Frozen at the keyboard once again. Trying to squeeze something that makes sense from the gourd. It has ossified during the night and it's up to me wring those edges to soften them and make them more pliant. It's a battle every day. A question came up yesterday, no, the day before, and I answered it immediately. The way I used to. I've slowed so much. Information used to be like little toys sitting well organized on the shelves of my room. No, that's not exactly right.

Information came to me in packets of various interest. When I'd hear something I would immediately see what else it fit with, what it sounded like, what it resembled and then I would put it away, somewhere. It wasn't organized like a filing system. It was tossed on the shelf and I could usually reach in and find it when I needed it. The very last way that I looked for stored information was to remember it in order of hearing it. That wasn't my way.

I'm just not reaching for things as often now. That's the problem. It's all still there, right where I tossed it. It still has all the associations that I assigned it when I heard it, but it's amazing to me how hard it is to recall it now.

I would like to have that snap back. That crispness in my mind. Maybe I need to not have the jet engine sounds running behind me as much. I will try having music in the background more. Still when it's noisy in the house the drone of the engines help me focus. Once I get focussed, I can stay there with music in the back. I'll try that.

I will also try sticking in the writing mode more. There's no reason for me to break away as often as I do.

Once I start, I really like writing. There it went again. I need to keep those departures under control. Keep the breaks short. Get back to the keyboard.

What would really help would be to get the story done and move on. I want something special to conclude this current story. Although I'd be happy just to finish it and learn something from it.

What would make it special? I've had some decent thoughts about it. His mother comes back into the picture. Money, no money in the estate. Bring Rusty VanAmburg into the picture when he gets back. What about Kaylen, is she gone? Give each secondary character something to identify them with. Sam VanAmburg should have a damaged left forearm and hand. I like the agent Teddy.

Well, the point is to get back to London and see what happens.

More later,